ZZZ' Sleep in Breast Cancer Survivors

Catching some zzz’s is a cartoonish way of describing sleep. In fact, it was the only way
for a cartoonist to connote sleep (and not death) almost a century ago. Capital ZZZ’s,
maybe punctuated by an exclamation point, were supposed to replicate the gentle sound of
snoring. So simple and so effective when you see them in a cartoon panel.

Sadly, there is nothing comical or simple about your relationship with sleep when you
become a cancer patient. In fact, it seems as if there is a vast conspiracy allied against you
and your ability to sleep. Your mom always told you that you needed a “good night’s
sleep,” and there’s plenty of research to support the idea that sleep is one of the most
restorative things you can do to maintain a healthy body and mind. And admit it, sleep is
probably something you have always aspired to in the hurly-burly of your daily demands.

Ah, to sleep, perchance to dream? Actually, I’d take sleep without any dreaming. Sleep
deprivation seems to be the affliction of modern America, and it is even more common
when you enter Cancerland. The cabal lined up against your sleep is pretty formidable,
thwarting every effort you may have in mind. You enter a vicious cycle of sleep you can’t
get to heal and then your inability to sleep compounds itself, and the cycle continues.

So who exactly are these conspirators stymieing your best efforts? A veritable alphabet
soup of challengers, many of which you have met in the pages of this book.

There is A for Anxiety, your companion from the first moment you feel a lump or learn
about an irregular mammogram; C for Cancerland—a place you never, ever wanted to
visit, but now that you are there it keeps you up at night; D for the Drugs—you are taking
so many of them, and some make you tired, some make you nauseous, some make you
buzzed, and some you hope are killing the cancer; G for the Guilt you are feeling about so
many things, like What did I do wrong to deserve this?; I for Indignities, of which there are
so many once you start on this breast cancer odyssey; M for Mastectomy—it hurts so
much that it defeats sleep at every turn, including, literally, if you want to sleep on your
stomach; R for Reconstruction—so many surgeries, messing up every natural rhythm that
your body ever possessed; S for the Sex you feel bad about not having because you feel
like crap and hurt like hell; X for the eXhaustion you are feeling throughout this whole
ordeal but are too exhausted to sleep.

And of course sometimes these conspirators form a tight-knit brigade, like Anxiety fed by
Guilt, which is exacerbated by not wanting Sex. You get the picture: so many forces
marshaled against your ability to sleep.
So where are the opposing forces, ready to do battle against the formidable enemies of
sleep? Well, you’ve met some of them in the pages of this book too. D, that traitor, can be
found on both sides of the battlefield, because you can get Drugs to help you sleep. Don’t
worry about becoming addicted, get some sleep; they may not always work perfectly, but
they’re a start. P for the Pillows that can make you a little more comfortable while M for
Mastectomy is doing its darnedest to thwart you and your efforts to sleep at every turn. K
will help you sleep too—the Kindness of others will soothe the darkest moments that are
feeding your anxiety; thinking about V for Vacation can take you out of the Cancerland you
are visiting now to a place where you really want to be that will replenish and rejuvenate
you.
It is important to remember there will be replenishment and rejuvenation. But it will not
happen fast, and it will not happen the way you think it might. Dealing with breast cancer
happens not on your timetable but on the timetable of the disease. What you do have
control of is how you deal with it and how you want to cope. And getting some shut-eye,
however you can, is one of the best ways of all to cope.

ZZZ' Sleep in Breast Cancer Survivors