I constantly think about his cancer and feel down much of the time.What should I do? Would counseling help?

47. Despite the fact that my son was
diagnosed with cancer almost two months
ago, I constantly think about his cancer and
feel down much of the time.What should I
do? Would counseling help?

Many people find that counseling (or psychotherapy)
helps them to deal with the emotional aspects of
having a cancer diagnosis in the family.

Despite using adaptive coping skills, many people still
find that further guidance is helpful. A good place to
start finding help is the medical team (e.g., the doctor,
nurse, social worker, or chaplain). For patients themselves,
pain and other physical symptoms may be alleviated,
making them feel less down or preoccupied. Family
members may also respond with distress if their loved
one is suffering. Even if physical symptoms are not a
cause, people may feel better after a conversation about
their thoughts and feelings, particularly because feeling
depressed and anxious is common among family members.

You may feel relieved to know that others have
experienced similar feelings. However, if you still feel
that you would like further help managing your thoughts
and feelings or if you think you may be suffering from
more serious forms of depression or anxiety (see Question
33), you may want to explore additional methods of
getting support. Many places provide support and counseling.

Meet with your hospital social worker or contact
your local chapter of the American Cancer Society to
point you in the right direction. If your insurance company
covers counseling, review their list of mental health
professionals to find an appropriate professional to help.

Many people find that counseling (or psychotherapy)
helps them to deal with the emotional aspects of having
a cancer diagnosis in the family. Professionals are
trained to help people feel their best, both psychologically
and emotionally. The following is a brief list of
the most common mental health professionals.

Licensed clinical social workers (commonly CSW or
LCSW): Trained clinicians, usually with at least a
master’s degree (MSW, MSSW, DSW, PhD) and
additional training or expertise in their specialty. Clinical
social workers practice in a variety of settings,
including hospitals, counseling or mental health centers,
and private practice. Depending on their expertise,
they are able to diagnose and treat psychological
problems using counseling. They are also trained in
more general counseling to help patients and family
members through difficult time periods, with or without
an exact psychological diagnosis.

Psychologists: Usually have a PhD or a PsyD. Psychologists
can also diagnose and treat psychological
issues and are usually trained in a specific theory of
therapy (e.g., psychodynamic, cognitive/behavioral).

Ask a psychologist you are considering as a prospective
therapist to explain his or her theoretical orientation
and how it may help. Neither psychologists nor
social workers can prescribe medications, but they can
refer you to a medical doctor (e.g., a primary physician
or a psychiatrist), who can evaluate the need for
medications to treat depression, anxiety, or other
mental health problems.

Psychiatrists: Medical doctors (MDs) who specialize
in diagnosing and treating psychiatric disorders by
prescribing medications and/or providing psychotherapy.

Their area of expertise is determining the possible
physiological bases of mental disorders.

Other mental health professionals: Psychiatric nurses,
master’s-level counselors, pastoral counselors, alternative/
complementary medicine practitioners, and other mental
health professionals can also provide certain types of
counseling and anxiety-reduction techniques. As with
choosing any professional, be sure to investigate their
qualifications and experience and how their expertise
meshes with your needs.

Important Note: If you are thinking about harming
yourself or another person, or if you have plans to
attempt suicide, call 911.

Questions to ask a mental health professional:

1. What is your training, and are you licensed to
practice in this state?
2. Do you have experience helping people with cancer
or family members of people with cancer?
3. What do you charge? Do you accept our insurance
policy?
4. How often and where can I be seen (e.g., in a private
office, in the hospital)?
5. What do I do about an after-hours emergency?
Whom should we call?
6. Do you specialize in family counseling?